


Aomine's First Date

by bob2ff



Series: Satsuki and Dai-chan vs. the World [5]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: F/M, Humor, Male-Female Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-30
Updated: 2014-03-30
Packaged: 2018-01-17 13:05:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1388719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bob2ff/pseuds/bob2ff
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aomine goes on his first ever date.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Prep

**Author's Note:**

> Written for BPS' Challenge 64 (Ensemble).
> 
> Follows chronologically after [Bonding Session](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1332994), although can be read as a standalone.

Momoi knew Aomine so well she knew exactly when to spring the news on him when his defenses were weakest. She crept on an unsuspecting Aomine, still groggy from having woken up from a nap, and pounced.

“Dai-chan~! I found a girl!” she squealed.

“Whaaa…” Aomine just blinked.

As expected, Aomine had totally forgotten about what he had promised Momoi a month ago — if she could find a girl who was at least an F cup, liked basketball and could cook, he would go on a date with her and treat her nicely.

As Aomine rubbed his eyes and stifled a yawn, preparing to get out of this situation he had gotten himself into, Momoi just continued talking over him.

“I started with all the girls we knew plus all the girls our age and below in Touou as the population. Then considered your three conditions as variables. I started with ‘genuinely likes basketball’ to narrow the population range — this yielded Touou’s female basketball team, with a few other data points. Then I added—” Aomine cut her off with “Satsuki. I’m not going on a date.”

Momoi stomped her foot despite herself. “You are  _going_ , Dai-chan! I spent a month on this research!  _And_  you haven’t been doing anything productive!”

Aomine spluttered in protest. “I’ve been practicing basketball!” Momoi glared back. “You’ve just been playing basketball with Tetsu-kun and Kagamin for consecutive hours, and then napping right after. That’s not anything productive!”

She talked right over his “It’s  _their_  fault! They keep calling me!” with “Anyway, at least hear about this girl!’

Aomine knew when she was on a roll. He sighed as she talked. “Anyway, she’s not  _quite_ an F cup, but other than that she’s perfect!” Aomine perked up.

“Wait —” he started, but she cut him off. “Before you protest that she doesn’t meet your conditions, you  _know_  that’s preposterous. At the most there are only less than five girls our age who have even reached that specification.  _And_  you were just being stupid and perverted, so I ignored that condition after some sensitivity analysis.”

Aomine knew when he was defeated. Damn, Satsuki  _knew_  him — she knew that to win an argument with him, all she had to do was start including big words and he would start to zone out.

Time to get some backup.

***

“It’s your own fault, Aomine-kun,” Kuroko told him straight out. Aomine slumped while Kagami just laughed at him.

“Haha, Aomine’s going on a date! What’s next, arranged marriage?” he doubled over, laughing at the thought. Irritated, Aomine threw the basketball at his head. It bounced off hard and high enough to fall neatly through the hoop above him. “Another two points for me — I win again.”

Ignoring Kagami’s “Hey!” he turned to Kuroko. “Come on, Tetsu, you  _know_  Satsuki’ll listen to you if you just told her to lay off. And anyway, the only reason why I’ve been able to play with you guys this much lately is because she’s been distracted and busy finding this girl.”

Kuroko just looked at him. Then he said, “Let me clarify. I’m not helping you not because I think you should solve this yourself. I’m not helping you because I think this will be funny to watch.”

Kagami, earlier argument forgotten, dissolved into laughter again.  Aomine glared at him. “Shut up! At least I’m not scared of Tetsu’s puppy!”

Kagami suddenly stopped laughing. Yelling, he charged at Aomine. And so began the upteenth round of their basketball game.

***

Momoi felt so excited for Dai-chan’s upcoming date. She was so excited she felt she was  _more_ excited for his date than Dai-chan himself was.

“Of course you are, this was  _your_  damn idea,” Aomine grumbled when she complained that he did not seem enthused enough compared to her.

She ignored him, and continued picking out his outfit. If left alone, Dai-chan would most definitely just roll out of bed for this. It was  _imperative_  that he made a good impression. Momoi had put too much work into this for it to fail because of Dai-chan’s laziness.

The night before the date, Momoi was so nervous with anticipation she barely got any sleep. She rolled around in her bed, thinking.

What if Dai-chan did not like her?

_What if Dai-chan liked her?_

Suddenly, Momoi felt less excited. She did not know how to feel about this. She had been so focused on the research in finding a girl that fit Dai-chan’s specifications that she had not even thought about what would happen  _after_  the date.

Well, I would have more time with Tetsu-kun, she thought to herself happily, comforted.

But still, she couldn’t help wondering — if Dai-chan got a girlfriend, who was she going to drag around on shopping trips and cafe outings?

If Dai-chan got a girlfriend, who was she going to excitedly discuss NBA playoffs and player statistics with? Who was going to ignore her quoted data and yell  _gut feeling_  instead whenever they had debates about basketball strategies?

Suddenly, Momoi did not know if she was ready to share her best friend with another girl just yet.

 


	2. The Date

Aomine was having a lovely dream about playing basketball in the NBA, Horikata Mai-chan a cheerleader on the sidelines, when he is awoken (as he was most mornings) by Satsuki’s shriek. “Dai-chan, your date is in _half an hour_!”

Groaning, he rolled out of bed. “Where am I meeting her again?” Satsuki whacks him on the head. “ _Come on_!”

He showered and got ready in record time while Satsuki called through the bathroom door an ongoing stream of ‘advice’— “Dai-chan, make sure you offer to pay for her, unless she doesn’t want it.” “Dai-chan, don’t go on and on about basketball until you forget you’re talking to her.” “Better yet, Dai-chan, don’t bring up basketball  _at all unless she does_.”

Aomine, amidst his snapped responses, “What?! I already pay for you all the time!” “That happened  _once_ , and that guy was boring anyway — what was his name again?” “Man, this is going to be boring — what am I supposed to talk about then?”, was shoved out of the front door, a bunch of flowers thrust in his hand and a departing yell of “She’ll be waiting for you at the train station!”

Left standing blankly, he rolled his eyes and headed towards the station. Time to get this over with.

***

Momoi was worried. Maybe she should have gone with a double date (her and Tetsu-kun, Dai-chan and his date) instead. Then she could have kept an eye on him to make sure he did things  _right_. And would have gotten a date with Tetsu-kun too, as a bonus!

As it were, she was wary about hanging around Dai-chan too much. What if the girl got the wrong idea? So she went with the next best thing.

“Ki-chan~!” Momoi giggled into the phone.

“Hi Momoichii~!” Kise tittered right back.

“Want to do some fun reconnaissance with me?” Momoi asked sweetly. “Dai-chan’s going on his first ever date~!”

The line went silent for a bit. Then Momoi heard a squeal of excitement. “I’m getting Kurokochii! He won’t want to miss this. Where shall we meet?”

***

Aomine was having fun, to his surprise. The girl was quite pretty, with short hair like Horikata Mai-chan’s (always a bonus) and tall, reaching Aomine’s chin. She had to be around 5’ 8. She had provided an excellent first impression by presenting him with some homemade snacks when they first met.

His own first impression on her, however, had been much to be desired. He hadn’t had any experience dating, after all. He had shoved the slightly crumpled flowers into her hand, mumbling “These are for you.”

Then he had asked bluntly, “Are these edible at all?”, and, peering at the snacks closely, said “I don’t want to get food poisoning — I have a game tomorrow.”

She had just laughed and ate one herself “as proof.” So he began stuffing himself on them (they were good, and he was hungry, okay?) while they walked through the streets of Shinjuku. Luckily, as a member of Touou’s female basketball team, she had immediately evoked that common interest. Aomine had excitedly jumped on the topic and ran with it.

“And suddenly Kagami was  _right there_ , but then the idiot was too slow, so I—” Aomine is in the middle of a spirited retelling of Kagami’s and his 8th or 9th one-on-one game, a particularly exciting one, when the girl suddenly cuts him off.

“Aomine-kun, let’s go into here! There’s a discount for couples,” the girl said coyly, pointing at a cafe. She touched her hair and leaned into his shoulder.

“And just like Lebron, I —” Aomine was caught off-guard in his lack of experience with flirting, and didn’t quite know how to answer her. “Er…what?” Suddenly he noticed something. His eyes narrowed.

“I knew it!” he shouted, pointing at Satsuki, Kise and Tetsu. They had done a pathetic job of trying to be inconspicuous, after all. Well, Tetsu did pretty well— it took work just to notice him on a regular basis. It was his companions that had given him away.

Kise was surrounded by fangirls, his flimsy disguise of oversized sunglasses and a beanie not doing much to hide his identity. Satsuki was wearing a hoodie, but her pink hair was vivid. She was clinging on to Tetsu, which gave him some presence as well. The fangirls’ screaming were unmistakable.

“What the hell, Satsuki! And you brought Kise and Tetsu along,” he said accusingly. Secretly, he was glad. He had  _no idea_  how to be suave in his response to the girl’s flirting.

Satsuki widened her eyes all-too-innocently. “Dai-cha—I mean, Aomine-kun, what a coincidence! Tetsu-kun and I were just on our  _own_  date, and we ran into Ki-chan as well!”

Tetsu just looked at him and said, “Nice running into you, Aomine-kun.” Aomine glared at him. He just  _knew_  Tetsu was hiding a smile. Kise had given up denying his famous identity and was in full-on star mode, smiling dazzlingly and signing autographs for his fans.

Aomine’s date looked at all of them and said politely, “Should we all hang out together then?”

Aomine was horrified. Sure he was glad they had gotten him out of the earlier situation, but there was  _no way_ he was going to have Satsuki  _right there_  scrutinizing him during his date. And Tetsu, the jerk, would just be laughing his hidden laugh the whole way.

So he said wildly, “No— let’s go here instead!” And dragged her into the nearest store.

Which, to his late realization and mounting horror, was a women’s lingerie shop. The girl stared at it. Then she looked at him. She looked like she was trying not to laugh.

“Erm, Aomine-kun, I think we’re moving a bit too fast…?” she said. “It’s only the first date.”

Aomine wildly backtracked, feeling his face grow hot. “No— I didn’t mean- I meant…” Then she laughed lightly.

Thankfully, Satsuki came again to salvage the situation, to Aomine’s eternal gratitude (though he would  _never_  tell her that). She whacked Aomine on the arm. “Dai-ch— Aomine-kun! Ki-chan wants to ask your advice on basketball shoes.”

Turning to the girl, she smiled apologetically. “I’m so sorry to interrupt your date, but you know Kise Ryouta, our model friend? Well, he can be quite a diva, and when he wants something, he normally gets it. His tantrums are too much to deal with.”

The girl just smiled, looked at her watch and said, “It’s fine. I need to go soon anyways.” She looked expectantly at Aomine.

Aomine frantically started thinking. What was an appropriate way to say goodbye on a first date? Suddenly he wished he had listened more to Satsuki’s advice this morning. Then he leaned tentatively in, and the girl seems to respond well, leaning closer too.

And he patted her on the back, hard (she stumbled a little), and raised a fist. “It was fun hanging out! Let’s play a one-on-one sometime?”

The girl stared at his fist bump. Then she bumped his fist. “Sure…” she said, slowly.

After she had gone far enough out of earshot, Satsuki whacked Aomine on the head. Hard. It took impressive dedication for her to do so, as she had to tiptoe to the highest point to reach it. She felt it was well-worth the effort and completely well-deserved on clueless Dai-chan’s part, though.

“What kind of goodbye was that?” she demanded. “You looked like you just had a guys’ hangout instead of a date!”

Rubbing his head, Aomine said crossly, “Shut up. You shouldn’t even be here anyway.”

Satsuki opened her mouth to argue further, but then Tetsu showed up. “Can we leave the lingerie store now?”

As Kise ran up to them, yelling excitedly “Aomine-chii~! How was your date? You seemed like you were having fun!”, he got besieged by the women in the store. They squealed his name and asked him which type of lingerie he liked best.

They all unanimously decided it was a good time to go just then, and left, ditching him.

Saying their goodbyes, Tetsu said simply, “Kagami-kun will be very excited to see you again when we next play basketball.” Aomine just whacks him on the head, grumbling, “Sure, you jerks can laugh at me now, but I’ll be the one laughing when I beat you guys  _again_  then.”

Satsuki and Aomine made their way back home. Satsuki looked at Aomine under her lashes keenly.

“Did you like the date, Dai-chan?” she asked tentatively. Her question sounded unsure, a little uncertain. It was a question looking for a specific answer. Luckily, Aomine knew Satsuki, even if he didn’t know girls.

“It was fun. I don’t think I’ll want to date much soon, though,” he said. “I won’t have the time once basketball season starts, anyway.”

She perked up right after hearing his answer. Heh, even if he didn’t understand most girls, he could definitely see right through her. “You’re right! After all, we need to win the next Interhigh, and the Winter Cup!”

They walked together, talking spiritedly about basketball, Satsuki quoting data and Aomine saying that he  _just knew_. They talked about basketball in the way they always had, since they were 6, walking home from pre-elementary school.


End file.
